Signori, I ask.

song: Lost by Michael Buble.



It finally hit me. so hard. that I nearly teared. I'm lonely. Just lonely.

The feeling rise so high when a friend of mine lost her hand phone, and making a simple shopping trip so difficult. I was living life so lonely till I did not even realize I was lonely, yet I am happy. Looking back, celebrating a joyous event, such as scoring excellent marks in the Psychology report, getting new shoes, celebrating sister's 22nd birthday, celebrating the end of First Year in university, and the end of the most horrendous exam papers ever sat etc, I was celebrating all this alone. No one to hold hands and jump around and cheer or throw confetti. No one to say " Good for you! I'm glad it's done too".

Sister would say "You better go hunting soon, cause sooner or later, all the good ones will be gone". I refuse to believe her even though, I know that she is telling the truth. However, the need to find 'The One' is always blocked by the reason 'I haven't enjoyed my single life to the last of it yet,there is always time.' Mom would say " On the bright side, you are saving yourself a lifetime of arguments and disagrees." But, the Bright side is not bright enough to convince me. I want to have an argument, I want to be the pain in the ass girlfriend, who wants this color napkin instead of that, and then I want to realize that I am the one who is wrong, and be the stubborn one refusing to admit till he gives in and then we are a happy couple all over again.

I want that. I want to share. I want to give. I want to hold.

I just want to erase the word loneliness.

PS: I'm not sad, I'm just at the realizing stage.

The veil of decency.

song: My Memory by Winter Sonata.

The first paper. Done. Now, moving on to the second paper. Human Biology.

Well, I do not know how long I have been experiencing writers' block, but I sure know that it is a god damn long time.

Till then, goodbye.

The invictus.

Whom was beautifully imperfect.

song: I don't wanna miss a thing by Aerosmith.

16th October 2009.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DIENESH ANANTH!

:)

Dear Mutton Dalca,

This is specially written for you from the bottomless pit of my heart. Firstly, Congratulations in turning 19. :) We have come a long way, and I treasure every moment with you. I consider myself very lucky indeed, not only to have one family as a best friend, BUT two. I thank God for that. :)

Dienesh, You are the most supportive brother that I can ever get. Just being there matters the most. and You did. You did not have any fancy word or anything when the clouds were grey, you simply lend me a shoulder to cry on. Probably that's the only thing a sister needs from her brother.

D, It was very difficult moving away from the group in the beginning, but you gave me Hope. No matter how physically we have changed, we are still the two little cousin in patti's house playing. :) I love you very much, and I would stand infront of a moving bus just for you and the others.

That's because, a part of my heart beats for the love of our frienships. (including the whole gang.)

Happy birthday.
:)

Loving you more and always.
:)

Hanya bidadari sebagai ganti.

song: Superman by Stereophonic

15th October 2009.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHOBINI BALRAJ!

:)

• Did you know that You're the one held me up for all this time?

• Did you know that whenever I fell, You're the first the held your hand out?

• Did you know that for all the tears I've shed, You're always there with a hanky?

• And Did you know that how lucky and grateful I am to God to get a friend, a family, and an inspiration all in ONE?

Now, You do.

Happy Birthday. :)

PS: I'm always here for you.

PSS: GET DRUNK! WOOO HOO! :D

love you more always.
.

Happiness is a warm gun - John Lennon.

song: Deeper Conversation by Yuna.

When I hold you in my arms and I feel my finger on your trigger,
I know no one can do me harm
because happiness is a warm gun.

Quoted by John Lennon, The Beatles.

*****************

Someone told me once that If you eat chocolates in a certain amount, the feeling of being in love will blossom once more like how a blind man sees the sun for the first time.

and I said, well Lucky me. I do not know the feeling of being in love because I haven't been in one.

yet, I still feel the love around me, baby.

there goes the bell.

Ding.

He was a beautiful refuge.

song: Try by Asher Book.

I guess playing our part does not matter anymore.

It is true.


It takes both hands to clap.

There's no point to fight the fight
any longer.

With a big popsicle grin.

song: Sugar Sugar by The Archies.




The exam timetable has finally arrived.

so here it goes, The Horror.

27th October 2009, Tuesday, 0930 : Introduction to Psychology 2

5th November 2009, Thursday, 0930 : Introduction to Human Biology

14th November 2009, Saturday, 0930 : The Biology of Disease.

Note the underlined Saturday.

yess, I have an exam on a oh-god-you-gotta-be-kidding-me Saturday. adding to the list of The Horrors, I have a test for my disease paper which i am not ready yet coming up tomorrow. and to add the joy of the day, Wellington has been cursed with a nasty storm for the whole darn week.

Just shoot me now.

why do such things even exist?